


The Costs of Choice

by ErisMarriott



Category: Star Stable
Genre: F/F, F/M, Game: Star Stable Online, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:00:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28085079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErisMarriott/pseuds/ErisMarriott
Summary: You are invited to Moorland for the summer to work towards being accepted to the Jorvik Equine Institute. You're tasked with doing hard work; some of your chores, though, start to have broader consequences than just mud, sweat and manure.As you complete your tasks, you're confronted with strange feelings that start to develop within you: depression. Anxiety. Uncertainty. All the things that come with trying to stay on the pedestal you've set for yourself in your effort to make it into the Institute.Additionally, you meet a strange man at the circus who warns you that all is not as it seems. Will his warning prove true?
Relationships: Alex Cloudmill/Maya Dew, Ydris (Star Stable)/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. Welcome to Moorland

You fiddle with your thumbs as the bus nears to its final stop. You look down at your ticket. The words _Fort Pinta_ have nearly been rubbed away by your constant fidgeting, but they’re present. It’s not your final destination, but it’s the farthest that the bus will go. After that, you’ve got a long walk to the place you’ve been yammering about to your family for years. _Moorland Stables_. In Jorvik, of all places.

You’re nervous, understandably. It’s not like Jorvegians don’t speak your language. It’s true that they have a native tongue, but most have adopted English anyway. But the culture is vastly different here. As much of a horse enthusiast as you are, you can’t help but wonder if your enthusiasm will be enough. Hardly anyone rides cars in Jorvik; going to the mall is a rare venture and cellphones do the bare minimum with the signal that Jorvik gets with its cell towers. Most have been banned or strictly zoned to specific places to prevent the encroachment of businesses like GED—Global Energy Domination.

_What a name_. You roll your eyes. Part of you wonders if this was a wise idea. You’re desperate to earn a slot in the Jorvik Equine Institute. It’s top of the line; your studies have led you thus far and you’re not about to give up. But the luxuries you’ll leave behind in the meantime… the Institute itself is just a means to an end. When you’re done here, you can leave and take your experience with you to cleaner stables and nicer places.

Still, a certain buzz of energy fills your veins when the bus finally stops and your feet land themselves on the worn cobblestones and dirt. Silence settles on the air after the bus pulls away, leaving you stranded until either the next one comes back or you decide to make the most of your fare and commit to the journey ahead. You check your cellphone. You notice texts come in a delayed fashion—many seem to have been sent throughout your journey, but they’re arriving in strange, jumbled batches.

You groan.

_This is going to be a long summer._

You turn your attention to a text from Justin Moorland. You know he’s the one you’re supposed to meet with your lease horse for the summer. You’ve promised yourself not to get too attached. There’s too much risk involved. If things don’t work out or you don’t make it to the Institute… You’re not one for self-confidence…. Hedging a bet on a living creature based on your personal success isn’t something you’re ready for.

Still, you can’t help but smile as you read what Justin has sent.

**Justin Moorland: [H/N] can’t wait to meet you! I know it’s a long walk from the bus stop, but I’ll be right here waiting with them! We’ll have snacks for you along with [H/N] when you finally get here to meet them!**

You stifle a giggle, though you’re appreciative someone thought of snacks. Justin sounds like a real character. You slip your phone into your pocket and tighten your satchel on your back. You didn’t bring much. You have a laptop, some books, and clothes. Some of your belongings were sent ahead to your dormitory where you’ll be staying. And that’s inside the stable, somehow? The thought of _living_ in a barn sounds odd to you, but you kept your mouth shut. You’re a go-getter and you’re not afraid to get your hands dirty.

Hours seem to pass by; your watch tells you it’s really been only thirty minutes but you can already tell that Jorvegian summers are unforgiving. It’s only just beginning and you’re sweltering. When you finally see the stable peeking out from beyond the hills leading into Moorland, you let out a sigh of relief.

You’re sure that when you pass through the entry gates that you’re a sweaty mess. Hardly presentable and even less-likely to appear presentable. Someone should have told you that riding clothes were better put on once you reached the stable. The boots you’re wearing are still new; you spent hours breaking them in before you left the night before. After the long trip, they’re still chafing your skin as new leather tends to do. And they’re _stiff_.

Justin holds out a welcoming hand to you—at least, you assume the man in front of you is. He’s young—younger than you, which puts you off a bit. His hair is shaggy and dirty from clearly long hours of hard work and his hands are calloused, further revealing just how much effort he puts into the various jobs his father gives him around the stables.

“Justin Moorland. You must be [Y/N],” he smiles. “Sorry you got dropped off on such a hot day! If I weren’t so busy, I might have rode over to get you and have you meet [H/N] at the bus stop. But things have been… hectic….” The way he casts a glance over his shoulder makes you wary.

_What’s going on?_

You table that question for later. It’s none of your business, anyhow. You’re here to learn how to work hard and make a name for yourself, both as a stablehand and an equestrian. Your minimal knowledge of riding is what brings you to the “summer camp” for lack of a better term. You’ve had to earn all of the lessons you’ve had thus far; you’ve been around horses only when you’re working to earn the time with them in the first place. So you’re ready for what lies ahead. Odd jobs and callouses are no stranger to you.

“You need to meet [H/N]!” Justin is quick to change the subject and jostle you from your thoughts.

You’re not prepared for the beauty that stands before you. They’re the most beautiful Jorvik Warmblood you could have ever hoped for in your life. Their [c/c] shines in the light, gleaming from every angle. You know they’ve been washed for the occasion—horses are never that clean without a lot of effort. You make a mental note to thank Justin later for putting so much care into having [H/N] look so pretty for your arrival.

Before Justin can say anything else, your horse tosses its head free of his grasp, the lead rope snapping from his hands so [H/N] can come trotting up to you. Something in the air shifts; you swear the light from the sun shines and beats down upon you both even brighter than before. When your horse’s muzzle makes contact with your fingers, a jolt of what you swear is lightning fills your veins.

_This is the one_.

You shake your head, reminding yourself of your earlier promise. But already you know it’s going to be broken with the way [H/N] nuzzles themself against your chest for further attention. Justin is laughing.

“Well, I’ll be! I do know how to pick ‘em! Looks like you two will get along just fine!”

You greet his laughter with a hesitant smile, choosing instead to return your gaze to [H/N]. You can’t help yourself. A small girl inside of you still asking Santa every year for a horse has finally found her present beneath the tree.

_If only I could actually own you._

A throb of pain shoots through your chest as you’re reminded that this horse is just being _leased_ to you. And your success determines how long you can keep riding them. Sighing, you look to Justin, knowing that further instructions are to come.

You both spend the afternoon reviewing what you remember in terms of how to tack up, perform proper horse care, and everything else you need to know about [H/N]’s known quirks and tendencies. You can’t believe that someone would _lend_ such a beautiful horse to a girl going to freaking summer camp. It’s clear from the way they hold themselves that they could captivate any audience, in your humble opinion. You know you’re going to look like a sack of potatoes slung across their back; you try to stifle that image of yourself as you finally do take your seat. Something between you both clicks; Justin sends you off to Maya, the stablehand.

After you’ve gotten your daily list of chores, you choose to complete them before you head on to meet with Jenna for your first lessons. You’re last on the list anyway; it’s nearing dark when you finally arrive to the small paddock. [H/N] has dutifully followed after you all day, standing in the stable while you cleaned it, getting into treats while you got food for the other horses. Your’e growing fonder and fonder of this creature when you swing yourself back into the saddle and await Jenna’s instructions.

You fumble through your first attempts at getting your horse into a trot and getting the right diagonal. You’re more familiar with a western saddle, so posting is new to you. Jenna insists it will get easier with time and that there are plenty of events and lessons on Jorvik to gain more experience through. By the end, you’re able to canter with more or less success, though you have a bad habit of hunching over to hold on which, to your surprise, can end up telling [H/N] that you want to gallop. Needless to say, your positions could use some work.

“I’m sorry. It’s just been a while. I couldn’t afford lessons all the time growing up,” you stammer, trying to hide the reddish glow that’s dusted your cheeks. Jenna gives you a knowing smile. “Well, [Y/N], given that this is your first day here after a long day of chores—and on a new horse—I’d say you’re doing well. I think you’re ready to at least start exploring Moorland on your own. Just keep practicing. Show me you can clear at least that small obstacle in the ring so I know you can hold on properly if you happen upon any barriers that might be lying around the stable and I’ll let you be off. Lessons, from now on, will have to happen with others, I’m afraid. The Bobcats will want to see you, I’m sure.”

You swallow a lump in your throat. _Jumping?_ You feel [H/N] tense up beneath you; they can tell that you’re nervous, but you push on anyway. There’s no time to lose. Somehow, you both make it over the obstacle. You know you’re supposed to hold yourself in a position they call two-point; you hold it and make sure not to slam on your horse’s back on the other side. Granted, the jump is not that high and you’re not going that fast. But you make it. And it’s a little boost of confidence which, at this point, is all you need.

Jenna looks more than proud as you trot back over to her.

“Look at you! Right diagonal that time!”

You giggle, hiding the pride you feel swell in your chest. [H/N] relaxes again, their ears coming forward and, for a moment, you see something like a twinkle in their eye when they turn to look back at you.

“Thanks, Jenna! I guess I’ll see the Bobcats tomorrow?” Jenna nods, motioning you to lean down to her for a moment.

“Be aware that Loretta can be… testy. Especially with newer girls. She’s the leader of the Bobcats. Just be sure to assert yourself and let her know you’re not to be tangled with and you should be fine. Don’t start drama; that’ll come on its own. But I do want you to be safe and aware before you head over there. And before you turn in, make sure you stop by and see Thomas Moorland. He wanted to speak with you before you get settled.”

For some reason, all of this information makes you a bit dizzy. You tighten your grip on [H/N] through your seat. You hate tugging on the reins. It’s a habit you were always told to avoid.

You wave goodbye to Jenna and find that Thomas Moorland is not far off. A broader man with tanned skin, Thomas is the image of a jolly man that could someday be a mall Santa Claus. His plaid derby hat is particularly fitting to his fatherly image. Everything about him screams friendly but paternal. For a moment, you find yourself missing your own father. But you wipe that feeling away. You can’t be getting homesick so soon. Not yet.

“Hi, [Y/N], how are you settling in?”

You wipe some sweat from your brow before answering. “I’m doing great, thanks! I got all of my chores done; all I’ve got left today is to clean up [H/N] here and make sure they’re put away properly. Maya and Justin showed me how to do all that.”

Thomas laughs. “You don’t have to tell me. I saw you working up a sweat earlier; you are quite impressive! Maya speaks highly of you already! Say, do you have any experience in dealing with paperwork? Filing? I hate to dump all this on you, but I’m sure you’ve seen the construction workers hanging around. They’re from GED; Mr. Kembell, the CEO, seems to think that because I don’t have a physical copy of the deed to my land that I don’t have ownership of it anymore. If I can’t produce the document, he’s going to sue me for the rights to the land and take it from us all. That’s a bit much for you to know, but you seem trustworthy and are a bit older than the other girls that come here. To get to the point, Old Man Jasper is my father-in-law and has a copy, I think, of the deed. My wife Catherine passed away and he’s held onto it ever since; he won’t speak to me. If you can get it from him, do you think you could take that document to the mayor in Silverglade?”

Admittedly, your head is spinning. You simply nod, knowing that there’s not much to actually say in response to all this. Already, you feel in over your head. But what can you do but nod and play along? And the thought of Moorland going under? Where would you go? What would happen to [H/N]?

You don’t hang around long, not wanting to bother Mr. Moorland anymore than necessary. When you tuck in for the night, you’re reassured knowing that [H/N] is _literally_ just outside your door. The idea of having all this ripped away from you by GED has you petrified. You know horses don’t sleep like humans do; they sleep in small spurts, so you wonder what [H/N] thinks all night, cooped up in that stupid stall. You wish you had a proper paddock to turn them out to, but Maya said that’s a privilege reserved for students who stay and make it to the Institute or end up living in Jorvik permanently.

So, for now, you content yourself to keep an ear out for [H/N] in the stall before, eventually, you’re lulled into a deep sleep.


	2. Global Energy Domination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You begin to feel conflicted as you carry out your chores around Moorland. 
> 
> What will you do as events unfold and the consequences of your choices start to be felt? 
> 
> And how will you deal with a certain surprise?

Your alarm blares.

**6:00 AM**

You groan, knowing full-well the horses won’t wait to be fed. You get up, tending to your horse first before joining Maya in the stables to take care of the others. With the two of you, it takes no time at all. You tack up [H/N] and set off to meet Old Man Jasper.

The old man gives up quite the fuss at being bothered “so early” and about his “dumb son-in-law that got his daughter killed.” After convincing him that you’re doing this for Justin, with some letters from Catherine Justin lent you just to help solidify the point, you manage to get the deed to Moorland from him. Granted, that involved a long ride to Fort Pinta and back.

When you return him the safety deposit key, he seems much calmer and remorseful at having been so distant from his family. You quietly wonder why it took something as simple as a request for a deed to get him to speak to his family again.

_Why didn’t anyone try to talk to him sooner? Did they really just leave him alone to be sad like that?_

The thought, though disturbing, is set aside for later when you ride into Silverglade. It’s about noon when you present it to the councilman. He says it will take a while to process the document, but that the court should be pleased with Mr. Moorland’s deed just enough to grant Mr. Moorland his no-trespass order against Mr. Kembell. For now, the bulldozers and strange man on the hill above Moorland remain.

You help Thomas Moorland by turning off the various GPS trackers that the workers have placed all around his property. _Why wasn’t this addressed sooner? And shouldn’t we wait for the courts to resolve this?_ These are all thoughts swirling in your mind as you finish up turning off the power box to GED’s machinery. It’s dirty work; you’re suddenly very skeptical of everything. [H/N], ever the astute partner, has begun to eye everyone else with much more suspicion than usual.

When you finally make your way over to the girls clad in pink, [H/N] is positively aloof to everyone else save the two of you. A part of you cherishes this bond that you’ve built together, even if it does come at the expense of your horse’s friendliness to other people. It’s you against the world, after all. Or… GED… and perhaps the law itself.

“Who are you?” A blond girl sneers in your direction, her pink coat slightly more fashionable than the ones the rest of her cronies wear.

“My name is [Y/N]. Jenna told me to check in with you guys today.”

The girl scoffs, flicking her hair behind her shoulder and doing her best to display the most utter form of disgust at even having to look at you. You ignore her and [H/N] snorts with something like a tone of protectiveness. The girl’s own white horse responds by pinning its ears. You steady [H/N]. You’re not about to let them fight on your behalf over a little teenage girl who can’t stand to be challenged. You’re sure she’s probably a bit older, but it is a bit intimidating to think about being taught by someone a few years younger than you. But you’ve learned over the years that swallowing your pride and just going with it is the best thing to do when it comes to the horse business. Especially when you’re raised poor and have a late start.

“Well, if you listened properly, you’d know that Jenna told you that we stop lessons after 10:00 AM,” the girl huffs.

“Loretta, I think she was the girl running errands for Mr. Moorland today,” says another girl; her hair is a gorgeous, dark brunette. She has it slicked up in a proper ponytail and, judging from the way Loretta softens, is probably the voice of reason behind the stuck up airhead in front of you.

“Oh, well, whatever. Talk to Tan, then. I have other things to do.”

After some conversation with Tan, you realize that, perhaps, not everyone in this club is as stuck up as Loretta. She’s far kinder and even lets you do some practice routines with her. Your riding is getting markedly improved from all the errands you’re running and it shows when you work with her.

Everything is going great as the evening drags on; when Loretta doesn’t come back, things start to get worrisome. At least for Tan. You don’t really care all that much for Loretta, but because Tan is nice to you, you feign being just as interested in her club leader’s whereabouts. You’re told she was supposed to do some riding near Nilmer’s Highland which, to both of your surprise, is now blocked off by GED’s construction workers.

You decide that, while things are still potentially friendly with them and the courthouse hasn’t sent out an official response to the documents, that you’d better talk to Mr. Kembell about getting the pathway cleared so you can get Loretta and ease Tan’s concerns.

As much as the guy creeps you out, a few errands for him lands you a favor and a bulldozer. When you find Loretta, she challenges you to a race; your inexperience lands you with a big fat “L” on your head for loser and you swallow your shattered ego when you leave them as, somehow, an honorary Bobcat. Throughout the day, you’ve been given various gifts: shillings, shirts, and more. You’re not sure what to do with everything until Maya shows you that you have a small wooden wardrobe to place your belongings in inside the stable.

You help her finish the nightly chores and are about to turn in with [H/N] when Mr. Moorland comes running up to you.

“[Y/N]! I have good news!”

He’s out of breath; you pat him on the back while he steadies himself. He takes a look at the stables and smiles. “Working hard the both of you, I see! And your work has paid off in spades, [Y/N]! I just got word back from the councilman that Mr. Kembell has been officially ordered to leave!”

You cheer with him though, now, you know Mr. Kembell will remember you as the girl who got him kicked off and tricked him into lending you a bulldozer and a favor. Granted, you earned them, but still. He doesn’t seem like the type of person to be messed with. Then again, neither does Mr. Moorland. Not with all the connections he has that you’re now partly aware of.

“I also have some good news for you, [Y/N]. For only a few hundred shillings, the owners of [H/N] have agreed to sell them to you!”

Suddenly, you feel yourself go deaf. The ringing in your ears is all you can hear. You stumble back a bit, [H/N] stepping out to steady you. You grip their mane tightly in your hands. All of the errands you’ve been running and all of the shillings you’ve been collecting now seem so much more fruitful. Prior to this, you wondered if you would even bother buying yourself a shirt given the uncertainty of whether or not you’re staying.

“What would board be? And what—”

Thomas waives his hand. “As far as I’m concerned, Moorland owes you big time. All you have to worry about is paying for [H/N] and their food.”

You reach up and dig into your saddlebag, pulling out your pouch of shillings. The eagerness in your eyes never waivers as you count out the amount. You actually have _more_ than what [H/N] costs; you can hardly believe they’re being sold for this much.

“This is for real?” You hand Thomas the money.

“Yes, indeed!” He hands you, from his back pocket, the crumpled up deed of ownership to [H/N]. You’re on cloud nine as the two of you return to the stables. Moorland is saved and, for the first time in your life, you _own_ a horse. Though, part of you is certain that they really own you with the way things work around here. You giggle as you give them more treats as a way of celebrating.

You’re braiding their mane as you let the tears fall now that no one is around.

How could your dreams possibly get any better?


	3. Welcome to the Circus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As you complete your chores, you're tasked with taking care of a mysterious horse found on Moorland Beach. She leads you right into the strange and wonderful world of the Circus of Dreams.

The next day’s chores come even easier; training with the Bobcats… not so much. Loretta is particularly hard on you, though she’s not so much mean now as expectant. She holds you to a certain standard that you’re not sure you can ever reach.

You’re constantly running around doing chores and storing up shillings. You want to buy [H/N] everything you can from the mall the next time you get a chance. But right now, you’re planted right in the middle of Moorland. When you get back to the stables for lunch, Maya rushes up to you.

“[Y/N]! Are you missing a horse?” By the way she’s talking, you know she’s more than scattered. _She literally just saw me buy [H/N] yesterday; their price tag was a miracle! How could I own more than one?_

“No, my horse is right here,” you pat [H/N] affectionately; they nicker in response, eager whenever you offer them praise or attention.

“Well, there’s a strange horse down by the docks at Moorland. Say, since you’re a bit more experienced, do you think you could find out who it belongs to? It’s a bit of a liability issue with all the kids running around here.”

_First of all, I’m not experienced. Second, once again, I’m being put to the test because I’m not a kid? Like I don’t matter?_

You push aside this sudden feeling of animosity that washes through your chest. Maya has been nothing but nice to you. Still, the way you’re constantly running errands anymore is… taxing.

But you agree, taking off toward the Moorland docks. At least… in the direction of them. You’ve not made it to the beach thus far before now. You know you’ve made it when you see her. She’s a beautiful black North Swedish Horse; you recognize the distinctive features from your book on common Jorvik breeds that you read before arriving. Her silver-white mane is a paradox of color you’ve never seen on any other horse before. Her little white snip and deep purple eyes are a sight to behold. You wonder if, perhaps, this horse has stepped right out of Wonderland rather than planet Earth.

Attached to her bridle is a note. Something about an Amazing Ydris… who says she can be bribed with cookies? But not too many….

You giggle. You offer the mare a cookie; she takes an interest in both it and you. [H/N] gets along well with her, too, which is a surprise. They’re mostly suspicious of other horses. So with a new friendship blossomed, you convince her to follow you up to… well, where? You look at the note again; glancing back up, you see that the mare is leading herself. As if she’s telling you to follow along and not the other way around. It’s bizarre. You pass some abandoned farm buildings and houses before, eventually, you reach a purple wagon. It’s painted with gold embellishments in the shape of eyes and spirals that make you feel a bit uncomfortable.

But, standing in front of it is the only person in the world that could possibly distract you from such a bizarre wagon. Two mismatched eyes—each their own shade of blue—run you up and down as a smile bewitches you into standing still. His sleek black hair is tucked up under a top hat that shines in the light. His frame is massive; you’re not sure how some people become as tall as this man has. Then again, you’re short, so he’s probably moderately tall compared to most. But for you? He’s a veritable giant as he laughs at the sight of his horse whose name is, apparently, Zee. You’re half-aware of him speaking until he says your name.

“Wait, how do you know my name?”

“The amazing Ydris nows all, [Y/N]!” He chuckles; it’s now that you begin to hear the slight, French accent in his voice. It’s as though you’ve been stuck in a dream up until now. Then again, it could just be the sweltering heat and you might be on the verge of a stroke. [H/N] tenses, as if sensing your thoughts. Ydris seems unperturbed by your awkward gawping; you’re sure he’s used to such things given that he’s dressed like a freaking _ringmaster_ of all things. And it’s precisely that which he is. He’s telling you about his plans to bring a circus to Jorvik.

“Zee, did you bring me what I asked for?”

Zee tosses him a strange blue mask that he sets on top of a box sitting in front of his wagon. As your mind slowly starts to come back to planet Earth, you scream when a small man pops out of the box, now wearing the mask that Ydris had set upon it. This throws Ydris into an even grander fit of laughter than before. It’s like music to listen to, really. You keep yourself from swooning aloud.

_What has gotten into me?_

“This is why you’re my favorite companion, Xin!”

Zee snorts, a hint of jealousy twinkling in her eye.

“There’s no need to be jealous, Zee. You’re my favorite, too! You’re all my favorites—you’re my family! And [Y/N] here is part of that family now that she’s here! And [H/N], too!”

You can’t hide your blushing now. Instead, you just own it.

“Thank you,” you offer sheepishly. “How can I help my new family set up their circus? I imagine there’s a lot to do. I’m no stranger to hard work if you need someone to assist you.”

You, surprisingly, manage to say all this without passing out or stammering. You’ve been working all day; it occurs to you that you haven’t had a single thing to drink or eat yet. As if he really can read minds, Ydris procures a glass of water and [favorite sandwich] for you to have.

“We can discuss how to get started in a moment! Right now, you need to eat! I can’t have my little dove passing out from a heat stroke on me, now can I?”

You shake your head, sliding from [H/N]’s saddle so you can take your food from Ydris. Ordinarily, you’d be more skeptical of accepting such foods from strangers but, right now, you're grateful for the company, the escape, and the thought. No one else ever seems to remember that you’re a human being in need of rest and nourishment. And time to think things through before getting in over your head. [H/N] joins Zee higher up on the hill to munch on some clover. You feel bad about leaving their tack on, worrying they might roll and destroy it or that it might cause saddle sores. In an instant, the tack disappears and pops back into view on a stand next to you and Ydris.

“Wait, what?”

Ydris chuckles. “If you’re going to be a part of the family, you’ll have to get used to things like that around here.”

You turn to him, realizing that he’s got to be performing _actual_ magic and mind-reading. If he actually did what you just witnessed. You’re certain it’s the heat now that’s making you go along with all this, but you just can’t be bothered to worry about it. If Ydris can do magic, so what? You managed to buy your first horse and secure free board, too. All within the first few days of coming to Moorland. Of course, guessing your name and pulling food out of nowhere should have been your first clues that Ydris wasn’t just a mere magician. He doesn’t make any other grandiose movements or miracles as he sits and munches on… _cotton candy?_

You quietly nod and eat your food. It tastes better than normal. You’re self-conscious about people watching you eat, but right now, you make an exception. It’s all gone within minutes and Ydris lends you a handkerchief to clean your mouth off with.

“Is my little dove better? I was quite worried you might have actually passed out,” Ydris muses. You wonder if it’s genuine concern in his eyes or if he’s doing this all as a show to make you more willing to do work for him. Either way, you’re grateful for the help.

“Yes, I am. Ready to help set up the circus!”

For the next few hours, you open boxes and watch in amazement as he waves his hands and creates the tent and smaller fortune telling tent from what appears to be thin air. The boxes, you realize, were probably more for show and entertainment than to actually carry anything. When you finally place the sign above the entrance, Ydris is more than pleased.

“Ah, my little dove has done it! Thank you, ma chérie.”

You smile weakly. Your energy is drained. The food has worn off and you’re worse for wear. Something strange settles in your gut. Sadness?

_Nah, that can’t be. I got what I wanted, didn’t I? And I just helped a handsome guy put together the most beautiful circus I’ve ever seen!_

You end the day doing pole-bending for Xin. The poles were on fire and quite a few times you felt yourself get singed. But Ydris was more than pleased with the way you handled the course.

“I hope you will return?” The question comes after you’ve caught your breath from doing the race. Your body aches and it takes you a few minutes to collect yourself.

“If you want me to,” you smile sheepishly. “I really like it here.”

It occurs to you that this is the first place that you’ve done chores for that has made them feel like anything _but_ chores. Ydris constantly checked on you throughout the process and actually helped you, rather than ordering you around since you’re the older summer camp girl who can’t say no and “could use the shillings.” It’s a sour feeling you do your best to lock up again.

“You are always welcome here, dove. And when my show is ready, I want you here in the front row. We’ll bring down the house together!”

You laugh; you’re anything but prepared for him to lean up to you on [H/N] to plant a kiss on your cheek. Your entire face is on fire, but you grin at him.

“I’ll be back then. Maybe with a few more tries, I’ll be able to do Xin’s race without getting burned,” you laugh. He greets this idea with that beautiful smile of his. “I would love that! And as you get better, I would love to teach you trick riding! I think my dove would look beautiful doing some of the routines I have in mind—not that she doesn’t already look beautiful.” He stares at you with only the most flirtatious of intentions. You shy away from his gaze, but nod. Trick riding sounds fun, after all.

“I’ll definitely do that, Ydris, thank you! I have to go back to the stables now. More chores await me before I can retire for the night.”

He frowns at this. “Promise me, dove, don’t let them use you. Don’t let them fool you into thinking that these chores don’t lead down pathways darker than you intend.”

Suddenly, the wind carrying over the highland feels cold. You shiver. “I… won’t? How do I make sure of that?”

“You will know,” he starts. “And if you aren’t sure, you can always come ask me. Be safe, little dove. Now fly away before you’re late!”

He shoos you off playfully, but your heart twinges at the thought of leaving. You wave goodbye with a false smile plastered on your face. Something inside you squirms; [H/N] halts at the abandoned buildings, feeling your emotions out of balance makes them look more than concerned. You know they’re catching on.

“I think something’s wrong with me, [H/N]. What’s wrong with me?”

Their eyes hold a thousand answers; right now, you can’t seem to get to them. Instead, you ride back with them and finish your chores in an eerie silence. Maya isn’t there tonight—likely hanging out with Alex Cloudmill. It takes you a while, but you finish everything and bring [H/N] for the night, spending extra time showering them off and giving them a good shine for all their hard work.

You realize you haven’t had dinner. You make yourself something quick and gulp it down before going into your room to crash on your small bed. You set your shillings on the table and let yourself smile a little. It’s a small chunk of savings. Maybe you can save up and buy a better bed. Better tack for [H/N]. Maybe just save it and see what you can get in general.

Ydris’ words creep back into your thoughts for a moment. _What does he mean by the chores leading down ‘darker pathways than you intend.’_ Did he read your mind and know about what happened with GED? Or does he know more?

You wish he would have said something. You know you’ll go back again; maybe he’ll elaborate someday. You won’t press him about it, though.

_I don’t want to burden him._

It’s the first time you’ve let yourself actually think such a thought. Everything is weighing on you far more than you ever could have thought. You worry that you might explode with the sadness, excitement, and uncertainty waving over you. You’re on a pedestal; now, if you fail, you’ve got to find a place to put your horse if you don’t make it to the Institute. You stay up most of the night crying; when daylight finally comes, you finish your chores before Maya even wakes. Today, you decide you’ll visit Silverglade.

You met some nice people there, anyway. As you tack up [H/N], you still can’t rid of the sadness and exhaustion that creeps through your veins. Eventually, as you help Steve set up mouse traps and Felix pick flowers, your worries subside. All you can do right now is work.

_And maybe visit the circus later._

That thought and [H/N] alone are what carry you throughout the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone! This is my first time writing SSO fanfiction! As you can see, I went ahead and uploaded 3 chapters to give you all a taste of what I have to offer! I won't be updating as frequently as multiple times a day regularly, obviously, but I'm eager to see what you all think of what I have so far. I decided it would be worth posting this despite it being very different from the other fandoms I write for. 
> 
> I expect this to be a very long fanfiction, so buckle up kids, the ride is just begun!


	4. A Cacophony of Crimes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Y/n] gets caught up in the mess that the Baroness has created in an effort to hide her past. In the process, she begins to question everything as the dark weight of each of her choices starts to catch up to her. 
> 
> Can she escape? And will she choose to, if presented with the option?
> 
> **Note: minor spoilers about the main quest. This is the last part of the story that will follow the canon SSO plot. From here on out, it will be vastly different. :) **

You’re apprehensive when you approach Silverglade Manor for the first time. You’ve heard stories of the Baroness and her unequivocal riches and power in Jorvik; just to be in the presence of such wealth when you’re dressed in rags is enough to make you incredibly self-conscious. Were it not for the beauty of [H/N], you aren’t sure you would fit in at all.

Approaching the Baroness, you decide to introduce yourself as someone looking to help out. It’s what you do everywhere else, anyway. She shoos you away, much to your disdain and instead you end up helping her by way of the stable girl, Tyra.

Of course, you learn GED has set up an oil-drilling operation right outside the Baroness’ vineyards. Once again, your intuition was right. Mr. Kembell was _not_ someone to be messed with. If he poses a threat to the Baroness, then he could easily have you squashed like a bug—you’re certain he’s the type to dabble in organized crime along with the front of being a CEO. Or else, why not just settle everything in court?

Why the Baroness doesn’t have a case against him yet, you’re not sure. But a few samples of the vineyard and some sketchy errands to steal serial number engravings from the machinery have turned up all of Mr. Kembell’s activities as illegal. Not to mention he’s endangering the local wildlife—Felix’s ducks are a testament to that.

The Baroness warms up to you as you occasionally bring her reports of your progress from Tyra. You’re not too sure about this woman, though.

You’ve just finished up reading the latest bits from your oil samples when a familiar face approaches. You’re not sure where you’ve seen her before, but a girl named Alex Cloudmill approaches you. A memory of meeting her and a girl named Linda comes flashing to your mind. You’d all but forgotten it in your haste to do all these dang errands that come your way like water from a burst water pipe—you’d seen just how bad that could be firsthand in doing errands for Tyra.

At one point, you meet a rude girl named Sabine who has you deliver a letter to Justin. That ends up being a total doozy; Justin has plans to run away now. Something about his grandfather—not Jasper, either. All of this is incredibly confusing to you, but you and Mr. Moorland do your best to stop it. And that’s what led you to Alex—Mr. Moorland’s request.

“[Y/n], it’s you! I knew we’d run into each other again! Have you seen Linda?”

You shake your head; it occurs to you that [H/N] is looking a bit… upset? You reach down and pet them to soothe them while you talk to Alex.

“Tin Can and I have been looking for her everywhere! She’s usually running errands for the Baroness or hiding in the library with her nose stuffed in a book. But she’s not answering any of my calls and she has… duties… she has to deal with elsewhere. For our club!”

The way Alex says “club” makes you think that they’re probably actually in some sort of weird cult, but you don’t press. Instead, you just shrug again.

“Hey, I mean, I haven’t seen her. I’ve been here all day now doing errands and I haven’t even heard her name before now. The Baroness mentioned that her assistant was missing… would that be Linda that she was referring to? Also, have you heard of a girl named Sabine? She gave a letter to Justin that has him ready to run off and see his grandfather? I don’t know if that’s related but—”

“Uh, yeah!”

You’re a bit put off with how… animated and aggressive Alex is acting. It’s not like it’s _your_ fault that the girl is missing. Something tells you you’re going to get roped into finding her. It’s not that you don’t care to ask, but why not get the police involved?

“Why not ask the authorities? Submit a missing person’s report? And what exactly is bad about Justin’s appearance?”

Alex narrows her eyes, motioning for you and [H/N] to step closer. You’re not sure why you listen, but you do.

“I think the Baroness is behind Linda’s disappearance. And as for Justin… I can’t tell you. But you should have known better than to have trusted Sabine. She’s a Dark Rider!”

You roll your eyes. _Of course._

“Well, I’m sorry I’m not aware of your weird cult practices and clashes. And let me guess, the Baroness has supreme influence over the police because she’s rich? But she can’t use them to go stop Mr. Kembell? This smells super fishy, but whatever. Sure. What do you need me to do? About either thing?”

It ends up being an effort to record Linda’s crying voice in the castle which, to your terror, is loud and obvious to you and—apparently—to many in the surrounding village. Why no one has said a thing is particularly upsetting. You make a mental note to not say anything negative to or about the Baroness, lest you too end up in a castle where no one will rescue you because politics and money have corrupted the legal system.

When you bring the news to Alex, the both of you run to Moorland together to try and stop Just who— _surprise_ —is already on some ship with Sabine to go see his grandfather.

You’re ready to throw in the towel. Everything you do in the effort to help people seems to end up winding you down darker and scarier paths. You’re playing it off with apathy, but it’s scaring you to your wit’s end. You want to get to the circus before nightfall to at least do something for Ydris to earn some riding trick classes, but something tells you it’ll be a miracle if you make it to get a fortune before he closes up his tent at midnight.

You sigh aloud when you’re on your own, riding to the Hollow Woods to find the missing records for the Baroness and who she married once upon a time—apparently, it’s connected somehow. Sometimes, you tune out exactly what the importance of your missions are. You just do them. Action requested. Action given. Shillings saved.

You wonder what would happen if you say no. It’s something you’ve considered over and over again, but you’ve never found a satisfying answer. All of this comes with an immense amount of pressure to be right.

As you wander through the woods, you notice something flickering in the light. Before arriving on Jorvik, seeing a _flying_ paper bird might have convinced you that you belong in an asylum. But today? You don’t care. You reach up to catch it; to your surprise, [H/N] holds themself up on their hind hooves so you can reach. When you snatch it, you waste no time opening it.

**“My dear little dove, do not fret. I will wait for you so that you may come and learn. The circus does not close its doors to family. I eagerly await your arrival.**

  * ******Ydris.”**



Your heart swells. _How did he know?_

Then again, he knew your name and your horse’s name and… suddenly, you’re crying. It’s a deep, howling sob that escapes your chest. You gather the missing records from the burned down house and ride as fast as you can back to the councilman. The wind whips away your tears, but you’re sure the whole forest heard your shrieks.

  
The rest of the day is a blur to you. You do everything like a well-oiled machine. You connect the fact that Mr. Sandman, the Baroness’ ex-husband, was Thomas Moorland’s birth father and Justin’s grandfather. Apparently super a super evil guy, Mr. Sandman is actually Mr. Sands. You confront the Baroness with this information and, in her shame, she admits to her crimes and you rescue Linda with Alex.

It is well past midnight when you reach the circus. Your body is shaking; you’re certain you’re running a low-grade fever.

To your surprise, Ydris is standing outside his purple wagon. Upon seeing you, looking battered and torn, he frowns.

“Ma chérie, are you alright?”

You can’t find words. Instead, you slip from [H/N]’s saddle and crumple to the ground. Stars are swirling around your head and you can’t get up farther than to stand on your knees. You feel Ydris’ arms lock themselves around you as he hoists you up.

You start to become conscious again when you’re both inside his wagon. It smells of sweets and spices that you’ve never had the pleasure of encountering before now. Your mouth waters, but you know your stomach can't handle _anything_ at this point. It’s much larger on the inside, but you’re not surprised. It’s Ydris, after all.

He sits you down in a chair across from him, patting you to encourage you to sit still. He comes back with a hot washcloth and lays it across your forehead and has you lean back in the chair to hold it there.

“Are you alright, little dove?”

“No,” you whimper. “Everything is so confusing and terrible. It’s just like you warned me… this place is so corrupt! The Baroness basically owns the cops, but somehow can’t stop these GED people from destroying her property without sufficient evidence which, if you ask me, is sufficient by them even being there and just spilling oil everywhere. That’s a health hazard, if you ask me, and should be enough but _no_ , it just can’t be. And good lord, she locked a young girl named Linda in her castle to hide the truth about a past husband of hers?”

You’re rambling, but you don’t care. Your chest is heaving up and down to try and catch your breath.

“Where’s [H/N]?”

“With Zee, my dove. Before you continue, might I ask: why do you do these things? Why do you agree?”

You feel your heart lurch.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what happens if I say no. Will I not be able to work in Moorland anymore? Will I not be able to do what I need to do? I can’t lose [H/N]. And what about a job with the Jorvik Equine Institute?”

You’re crying again; Ydris is to his feet faster than you can comprehend and hoists you into his lap, wiping tears from your cheeks and tucking your head beneath his chin.

“Darling, I think the day has been too much for you. I think it’s time you start thinking about saying _no_. As for the consequences? So what if things do not go the way you expect?”

“I’ll have to leave, Ydris,” you whisper. “I’ll have to sell [H/N] and go back home. And I don’t want to. I… I don’t think I want to. I feel like I’m supposed to be here, but at what cost?”

“Then stay! I already told you, you are a part of _this_ family. And I would never use you in this way, do you understand? We can speak of this more in the morning, but I want you to stay here for the night.”

Your cheeks redden with embarrassment.

“I don’t have any clothes to change into and I haven’t bathed; I’ve gotten your nice suit all dirty—”

Ydris snaps his fingers and you’re clean, refreshed, and in pajamas. If you hadn’t cried yourself empty of any tears, you would cry more. Instead, you bury your face in his chest. You’re not sure why you trust him like this; it has to be that he’s the only sane person you’ve met. Weird, but not out to use you. Not here to make you do everything for him for little more than a handful of shillings and the subtle threat that Mr. Moorland might hear back if you haven’t done your job as you’re supposed to.

_Why do I put so much pressure on myself?_

It’s a question you’ve never asked. An even more terrifying question settles in your mind, haunting you as you keep yourself buried in Ydris’ embrace.

_What if I don’t want to keep playing this game? Is the Jorvik Equine Institute even worth it?_

“Is it?”

You look up at Ydris, your eyes glazed with exhaustion. For the moment, you don’t care that he just read your mind. Instead, you just continue to stare up at him as your breath comes in slower than before.

“I don’t know,” you whisper.

He runs his fingers through your hair. “Sleep, little dove. We can speak on these things in the morning. Please. Rest. You are safe here. [H/N] is safe here. Even if they burn your belongings and torch your invitation to be here, I will work to keep you safe and here myself. You have nothing to lose. Only decisions to make. Only to gain.”

It’s a lot to take in; you realize what he’s saying, but your brain can’t comprehend anything more. Instead, you take one last shuddering breath and pass out in his arms. Despite the dull ache in your chest, you feel a tension in your muscles disappear.

And you sleep—deeper than you have your whole life.


End file.
